Smile!

It's been 10 years since I have been experiencing this phenomenon and I still don't undertand it.

"What's wrong, sweetie, why don't you smile?"
"Is it that bad?"
"Where's that pretty smile?"

Complete strangers, always men, usually older men, feel the need to tell me, and other young women, who are walking down the street minding their own business, to smile.

What is this phenomenon all about? It is certainly an extension of the construction-worker-hooting-at-attractive-female phenomenon (which is by no means restricted to construction workers, mind you). But I think it is actually more widely occurring, or at least amongst more respectable sorts of men. Telling someone to smile is rooted in the good impulse to try and make a sad person feel happier. And I would be lying if random men on the street have not at times, on very rare occasions, succeeded in doing so. But mostly recieving these comments makes me feel annoyed. But more than annoyed - and I think this is the reason such comments are so distasteful - they make me feel bad.

Why? Usually I did not realize I was not smiling, and as behavioral psychologists will tell you, emotions can follow physical behaviors. When I realize I am frowning, I think, hmm, maybe I AM sad.
I am also embarrassed, almost like when a total stranger tells you your fly is unzipped or you have a booger in your nose. It's an invasion of privacy. (In the latter cases, however, one might still be grateful for the invasion. Or one might not.)
And if I am being really honest about it, these comments also make me feel ashamed. Because by telling me to smile these men are saying I am doing something wrong by not smiling.

But I am not doing anything wrong! First of all, what if I'm in a really bad mood? What if I just lost my job? Or found out that someone I love died?? I have every damn right to NOT smile and to NOT be hassled about it? And even if nothing's wrong, if my lips happen to naturally turn downward when in the resting position, resembling a frown, I have every right to not make an effort to smile just for the pleasure of random, strange men who happen to see my "frown" as I walk by them. Even if I want to frown just for effect, just to stick it to all those men who are bothered by it, that is my right as an American, nay as a human being!

So I say this:

Men of the world: If I somehow offend you with my lack of a smile, GET OVER IT!